So last week I came home to find my precious dog covered in pee. I had crated her up (we are working on crate training) and she apparently had an accident. The pee was everywhere. She got excited when she saw me and began to jump around. As she jumped, she splashed the urine all around. She smelled horrible. There was pee all around her crate. I didn’t have any other option but to scoop her up (getting pee on myself), bathe her clean (getting myself covered in water), and clean up the mess.
It was a disaster.
The sweet girl didn’t mean to make a mess. She was doing the best that she could. Unfortunately, despite her attempts, she made a mess. A big one.
It got me thinking. How many areas in my life am I peeing all over? How many areas am I splashing my urine on? Am I covered in my own, self-inflicted punishment?
It made me think about how I overthink my abilities and stress myself out. I have a tendency to think myself into a rut of sorts.
This whole situation is a great example. When I found Daphne (the dog) had used the bathroom in the crate, I felt TERRIBLE. I felt so bad and felt like a failure of a dog mom. I kept focusing on how much of a failure I am. I thought myself into a rut of disappointment. I peed all over my dog-mom abilities. And was in that rut for days.
I, far too often, get wrapped up in my thoughts and my opinions of something that I miss the actual success of the situation. What a smelly reality.
Another area of my life I have peed upon is my eating habits. A couple months ago I was vegan (for about 5 or 6 months) and ever since I stopped, I haven’t been content with my eating. I have struggled to figure out a good rhythm to my eating. And because of my lack of rhythm, I have just continued to throw guilt upon myself for my eating. I have just been peeing on myself.
And there are definitely so many other areas that I have been peeing upon myself. I have been spoiling my own life.
Basically what I mean is ruining my own life because of my own expectation or what I think I should do.
What a terrible life to live being constantly squashed by your own expectation.
I hate that. I keep trying to measure up to this unrealistic, self-inflicted, standard that I can’t.
I need to just be.
This cycle can end.
Have you been peeing on your own life? Have you been ruining things despite your best efforts? Let me know in the comments below…we have to unite in these moments! (:
(PS: Photo cred to my girl Annika Botha. Check her out!)